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Tempera brings the mountain to you

Remember that mountain you've always wanted to climb? Tempera will not only get it to come to you but it will also provide hiking equipment and if needed will actually climb the mountain for you.

Using Tempera is a walk in the park

Using Tempera is really just a walk in the park. If in that park you'll meet a baby, using Tempera will become as easy as taking candy from that baby. If there's a picnic going on and there's cake, you can consider yourself invited and things will become a piece of cake.

Tempera lives up to your expectations

Especially if your expectations are fluffy clouds. In that case it may even surpass your expectations; then your expectations will start having expectations of their own which of course Tempera will be able to fulfil as well.

Tempera is a breath of fresh air

It's like being on a frozen mountain top. It's like getting there and not being able to climb back down. It's like having to survive in that hostile environment for months just by eating insects and drinking tea made out of twigs.

FREE 6 Month Membership with purchase--For a limited time (UNDER CONSTRUCTION-STAY STRONG!

The Premier Illustrated and Uncensored Manual for going to Jail. Complete with over 50 graphic illustrations depicting life behind bars. This no nonsense, yet humorous incarceration companion will CAPTURE YOU, bring YOU INSIDE, and PREPARE YOU. This year, 500 Americans will be struck by lightning and 14,000,000 Americans will be arrested! Read this book and have an edge on those long nights in the "LOCKDOWN".

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